Thursday, 27 April 2023

Super Paper Mario: Saffron & Dyllis Super Show #70: Roast Whacka Bump

Roast Whacka Bump is made from WHACKA BUMP, obviously

so this is like... so you hit this mole guy on the head right... and his swelling comes off and you can eat it i guess?? Anyway I think it looks enough like a japanese MELON PAN so lets find out how to make that??


ok so like, what is a melon pan? if you think it has melon in it, you already fucked up, bad news back to square one. for some reason it is a bread roll thats wrapped in a thin layer of cookie dough, yes you heard me. So first ive partially-melted some butter and "whisked" it a bit, im going to try and get my mixer to do the bulk of the work here.


Next you add sugar, and here's where i already deviate from the conventional recipe. Since it's a ROAST whacka bump I wanna give it some dark brown appearance, so im using dark brown sugar which i mix with the butter here.


now the recipe says to use 25g of egg! who says that? so what we've got to do is beat and egg and then weigh it out, looks like its almost exactly 50g so im just gonna pour in half by eye lol


for the cookie part says to use "cake flour" which is a weird american thing, slightly smoother than plain flour but you can lighten it up a bit with a tablespoon of cornflour. It also says to add a pinch of baking powder. Wait do you normally use baking powder in cookies??? wait i guess so yeah.


after its mixed and gathered and kneaded a bit by hand and suddenly we have a perfect little sausage. Now we pop it in the fridge for ages while we do the rest, because cookie dough needs to be hella chill to work with.


Now for the bread, we're using BREAD FLOUR, a tiny bit more sugar but ill just use white this time, a pinch of salt and then we unleash the yeast!! For this small batch it said to use 3g of years but guess what my scales fucked up and now i have no idea how much yeast is in it hooray


then you want to add WARM AND WET ingredients... heat the milk to lukewarm/body temperature, im just gonna mix it with the rest of the egg, and they want a tiny bit more butter in there too. Sure.


Notice i've switched to dough hooks for the mixer, by the end you just wanna mix it a bit by hand and shape it into a ball. Then it has to do its FIRST PROVE! im going to leave it in a sunbeam.


Its gotten bigger! I poked it with my finger and it feels... puffy.


now we split it into five uh... roughly equal parts and attept to wrap each ball of bread dough in a disk of cookie dough. this cookie dough was disasterously unwieldy, and needed a truly generous amount of flour just to do anything. The rolling pin was even a lost cause, I ended up mashing it flat with my cold dead bitch hands


anyway thats come out alright in the end i think? Then you have to make the classic melon pan cuts in the top surface, and an extra sprinkle of brown sugar on the top. AND THEN wait get this, you actually let it PROVE for another 40 mins (i did it in the oven set at 30c) and then you bake it on full whack (180c-ish) for 12min

*****

This is the best one, they came out a lot flatter than they ideally should, but oh my goddd these taste amazing. All that effort? WORTH IT.

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